|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 18, 2024 20:39:06 GMT
I've just looked up kD tour dates Jules and unfortunately none are planned yet. But if she'd go to one when he begins touring that would be incredible.
First chance I get ill ask her out immediately. I'll be ready for a NO but it would at least put the cards on the table. I'll ask her if she'd like to get a meal together, or go play laser tag or go for a walk in the city, or, if she'd like to go to the MIT museum which somebody just explained to me has things that would fascinate anybody in my field of CNC machining (though maybe it would bore her - gotta rethink this option).
|
|
|
|
Post by MikeMusic on May 19, 2024 10:38:32 GMT
You're right Robert
Ask as soon as you can. Do some prep but don't overthink it
My stepson was smitten by this girl of Polish extraction, 2nd gen Brit
So much so he married her. 2 kids later....
Very good looking, very intelligent and just about everything else
I jokingly speak of her being too bloody clever
Let me relate the tale of David Mitchell, utterly smitten by Victoria Coren.
Something like - Tried once or twice, gave up, saw she was with another bloke, kept tabs, eventually asked her out, she agreed and eventually they married
Wikipedia gives a potted version
Mitchell met broadcaster Victoria Coren at Jonathan Ross' 2007 Halloween party and was "completely smitten". She decided to pursue someone else at the time and he later admitted to pining for her, but they had begun dating by December 2010. They were married on 17 November 2012, with Robert Webb as his best man.[100][101] Their daughter was born in May 2015. On 1 November 2023, they announced the birth of their second daughter. They currently live in Belsize Park, North London.
|
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 19, 2024 14:32:13 GMT
Thank you Mike. I'll take your advice, every word of it.
It's amazing to hear that can pan out like this for people. Meet somebody and be smitten but chooses somebody else. But keep tabs and keep trying. And now they are together and have a family.
I only just met this girl so my example here doesn't apply in this case but I've often reminded myself that while I say I like them...oh ye? How MUCH do you like her? Are you willing to take a few rejections for her and wait around while she gets things in her life organized?
If you like her a lot...prove it. And the guy in your example sure did, Mike.
|
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 20, 2024 1:34:14 GMT
Oh my god. She agreed to a date. Her name is Sylvia. Wow.
I feel like this is a reckoning for me with myself. Time to level up into a better human being.
|
|
|
|
Post by MikeMusic on May 20, 2024 6:10:46 GMT
Be yourself. Best version there is  Best of luck |
|
|
|
Post by julesd68 on May 20, 2024 10:50:42 GMT
Nice one Robert, best of luck!
Yeah just be yourself but avoid the MIT museum for now.
|
|
|
|
Post by MartinT on May 20, 2024 12:52:36 GMT
Well done, Robert. Good luck with the date!
|
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 20, 2024 17:01:12 GMT
Thanks so much guys. I'll be myself whilst simultaneously keeping this mindset put forth in a song. She is quite suspicious afterall. A suspicious agent of foxyness.
|
|
|
|
Post by MartinT on May 20, 2024 17:30:38 GMT
A suspicious agent of foxyness. Sounds good but you may want to hold back from playing her Calibro 35 until you know her better! |
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 20, 2024 17:37:22 GMT
Shit. Fair point Martin. A lot of their songs are about crime.
Maybe something more lighthearted like Eric Prydz?
|
|
|
|
Post by MartinT on May 20, 2024 17:49:16 GMT
 The trick is to ask her what music she likes and mentally find matches to things that you like. Then start playing those things in the car and at home when you're "showing her your etchings" to use an English phrase  |
|
|
|
Post by MikeMusic on May 20, 2024 17:57:11 GMT
Ask sensible questions and connect with what she says The Spanish Inquisition is definitely too far Listen more than you speak. |
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 20, 2024 18:08:29 GMT
You guys are right. I've had my fun with babbling endlessly while people listen.
I'll see what it's like to shut up and be there for somebody else now and listen.
After that though it's music time with dual dj's. I will ask for a good luck kiss before driving after we leave the restaraunt. Just a peck. Gotta drive safe.
|
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 21, 2024 2:46:33 GMT
I really thank you guys for the advice.
Ive discovered that to ask good questions I've had to stop thinking of good questions and actually listen in order to connect in order to hear. Every person deserves that.
Until I do that I'm just in my way which then robs the other person of actually being heard.
|
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 25, 2024 1:09:30 GMT
Sorry to have turned this into a diary thread guys. Im a bit bummed since last Monday Sylvia just fell out of communication.
My fault for getting my hopes up like that but also time to put my money where my mouth is when saying if you like somebody prove it. Go through some hell for it.
It's not looking good but either way who knows what's going on with her plus I know for a fact that she has very serious responsibilities. I'm grateful already, obviously disappointed, but as payback against myself for being an idiot for all of those years of my life I'll eat crap on this one and do the right thing and just be a friend in the background with no hard feelings.
Thanks for all of the support guys.
And as is customary in this bizarre thread mixing love advice and Italian crime funk here's a stand out track.
Bizarre drumming at 2:35
|
|
|
|
Post by MartinT on May 25, 2024 7:26:23 GMT
Sorry to hear that, Robert, but there really are plenty more fish in the sea. Try a dating app, then at least you can filter and get a date that you both want after chatting for however long it takes. It worked for me many years ago.
|
|
|
|
Post by MikeMusic on May 25, 2024 9:14:16 GMT
Always a possibility she has problems outside her control. Could be temporary When madam and I were first talking my home phone stopped working, for around a week. Didn't have a mobile Still not sure she believes the phone went all those years ago |
|
|
|
Post by MartinT on May 25, 2024 22:43:27 GMT
So, what you're saying is, Mike, that you had your magical power with equipment even back then?
|
|
|
|
Post by rfan8312 on May 25, 2024 22:49:45 GMT
Thanks guys...she has reached out to me today and she's a sweet person who cares very much for her family. I'll limit myself to saying Hi to her only on weekends once per week.
Ive realized that what I've done is not so nice. I saw somebody on fb dating, then friended them, was accepted and immediately started hitting on them. That's pretty cheesy. I'm lucky she even spoke to me in that case.
I'm age 43, at this age I think dating requires friendship. I need to be a friend not a creep from online.
Ive done a lot of dating before on dating apps from 2021 onwards but I'm not very photogenic so it takes A LOT of work to get dates. All of this is ok. We all have our struggles.
I bragged earlier about becoming a better person to get a date with Sylvia. I'm sticking to that regardless.
|
|
|
|
Post by MikeMusic on May 26, 2024 6:54:41 GMT
So, what you're saying is, Mike, that you had your magical power with equipment even back then? Always had it. The phone was dead at my end, but ringing for the caller I didn't know it was down as I rarely used it. Those days I got up, went to work, long day, back home, eat and bed |
|
